Cutting Hearts
by ChocolateReader
Summary: For just one moment, while her body was hurting, Her mind was at peace. Kagome's figured out a way to deal with the pain of Inuyasha and Kikyo.Once he finds out, he decides to do something about it. it leads to later challenges and newfound ideals.
1. Realization

It was the middle of summer in feudal Japan and it was ridiculously hot. Inuyasha had already taken off his fire rat robe. Sango was under a large tree with miroku on her right twirling his staff. Kagome was sitting in the hut with kaede. Everyone was trying to get cooler, but kagome seemed content to leave her long, heavy uniform sleeves down with leg warmers cuddling her thighs. "Kagome aren't you sweltering? I mean seriously, why do you have those on? Inuyasha pointed to her leg warmers. Oh…. Kagome twitched

nervously. " Um.. No reason….. I just like wearing them"

….. "Hhhhhmmm ookay." after about an hour, when kagome was just about to die from heatstroke, she noticed Inuyasha was gone and Kikyou's soul collectors were flying around overhead. She quickly became suspicious and ran into the forest distracted from the heat for the moment and how she would've passed out if not for this.

But once again she settled on the fact that Inuyasha would always love and care for kikyou.

"mmmmmmm"…..She heard a distinct whimpering ahead. She quickly hid behind a tree and gasped at what she saw. Kikyou was kissing Inuyasha and he was apparently kissing back, smiling when the kiss was broken. "Kikyou I will always protect you and I will never forget you. I love you too much."

"Oh, Inuyasha, in life I loved you but now as I am, I do not wish to start something that I can never finish. I must leave. We will see each other again for our quest for vengeance on Naraku's life. Goodbye Inuyasha." As Kikyou said her final goodbye she gave Inuyasha one last kiss. Kagome could feel the tears building up as Inuyasha turned to go back to camp and saw her.

Immediately Kagome could see the dulling in his eyes. One thought ran through her mind.

**RUN. ****she ran, no, not to the well. **Not this time. She would not let Inuyasha predict her. She would escape. She ran, as far as she could go, and never looked back. She eventually came upon a clearing with only a few trees. She finally let the tears run free. 'Kikyou, Kikyou, Kikyou! Why am I always second place to her! She never loved him like I do!…. But still… you cant hold two hearts with one hand.. even if you are half-demon.

I cant go through life like this. Loving someone that will never love me back. Maybe she had a chance with Koga or even more realistically, Hojo. She pulled out a small dagger. Her mom gave it to her after yura and the hair. She had a secret. No one could ever know. Especially not Inuyasha. She was through. She loved him and all, but the emotional pain was killing her. She was eating less and she was starting to get skinner and skinner. There was no going back now. Just for a moment, even though her body was hurting, her mind was finally at peace.

'How did I not smell her?" Inuyasha muttered regretfully. "This time I really hurt her."

he ran to the well, but he smelled no evidence of kagome ever being there. He caught her sent about a good five miles away from where he just saw kikyou. " kikyou… I wont forget you, but I will move on." I wanted to only tell you goodbye…. But we can never really part…. I wouldn't be surprised if kagome ran to be with that Hojo kid, or I'll admit Koga." she was close. He could smell the salt in her tears. He could also smell blood. What was happening? There were no screams of terror, no "Inuyasha!"

He could see her now. He quickly jumped onto the top of a tree. He was worried, scared, sorry, and most of all, he was tired. Tired of them fighting. Tired of seeing Kikyou, and tired of hurting Kagome. She had something in her hand…. It was metal…. Small like a toothpick…sharp ended...….no…. it was a small dagger. Inuyasha wondered what she was doing with it. He couldn't believe what he saw next. "Oh Inuyasha. Why do I do this to my self? Is it because I love you too much or is it because I'll always hurt no matter what you do?"

She didn't know he was in the tree but was she talking to him? Inuyasha thought. She lifted up her leg warmers and pressed the dagger to her thigh.


	2. One moment

I pressed the dagger to my thigh, and made one low deep cut. I started to bleed profusely, but I didn't care. Every time I do this, its after kikyou. I usually go home to 'vent" but this time I couldn't wait. I started to lift up my uniform sleeves but then I saw a red and silver blur run past and the dagger was out of my hands. Golden eyes stared down at me and I knew I reeked of sadness and fear. I prepared for the worst as I slowly looked up into his golden amber eyes.

I would not let her take another swipe. As I saw her lift up her leg warmers I saw hundreds of small cuts that were surely not from demon attacks. I was her protector. Wasn't I? . I protected her from demons, and almost every thing else, so why is the only thing I can't protect her is from herself? when, -I pointed to her arms and her thighs -did you start this? "….." I wanted to tell her so many things but I couldn't. Not now.

I stared down as I told him my reasons. "Inuyasha ….. This is the way I clear my mind. When you sit quietly on a treetop, or you go out into a field and think about _**kikyou, **_I go home and do this. - I lifted up my arm sleeves-. "but why?" He asked. Because Inuyasha, for just one moment, while my body's hurting, my mind is at peace. One moment. One moment is all I need. It may hurt, but nothing more than the pain of you and _**Kikyou**_. I'm sick of being second place and I'm tired of being alone in this world!"

I can't believe what she just said. Did she really feel so inferior and alone that she hurt herself for a peace of mind? What is wrong with me? Did she feel that I neglected her so bad emotionally, that the physical pain was welcomed to not deal with the emotional pain to the status of Kikyou and I? no, she couldn't feel this bad…. I don't know anymore…..

"Im sorry Inuyasha, but I just cant do it anymore." once again I ran, Yes, this time to the well, I wanted to go home, I needed to. I spent so much time worrying about everyone else, that I never really got to enjoy myself. I didn't mean to start, it was an accident. Really. It was about the second time Inuyasha went to go see ugh, I despised the name now-_**Kikyou**_-. I was at home, alone in my room. I was still red from many hours of crying. I saw the dagger glinting in the silver moonlight. I was just curious really, but I was so angry, I couldn't stop myself. Soon, the pain became addictive. I couldn't stop, and I never did. Every time it was all because of Inuyasha and _**kikyou. **_Every time it was after hours of crying over something I could never have. Inuyasha's love.

\

I stood there. Dumbfounded. I reprocessed everything she told me. I decided to force down my pride and do something that would change my life. _**Our lives. **_I love Kagome but she still needed to know. All my actions have told her nothing. I understand that one minute I'm saying "Get back Kagome! I'll protect you!" and the next I'm like "Kikyou …. I still love you, sure I'll come with you." Of course she wouldn't know!….she'll never come back… No…. I cant live with that idea. I decided to go get her. _**Now.**_

_**As I ran, so fast than I have even with a ferocious demon behind me. I came to the well and smelled the scent of salty tears and drying blood. I couldn't believe what I was about to do , but no matter what I had to. If only to save my sanity.**_


	3. love you!

I jumped into the well. Finally. When I started running, I didn't want to look back… but I wanted to see if he would chase me. Ya know what I mean, where it's the guy's last chance to get her and finally tell her you love her? I guess…I just wanted him to come and get me like that. But no. I saw Inuyasha just standing there. I don't know what I was thinking. I was losing myself in his golden amber eyes and then….I don't know. I want to stay with him forever, but I cant. Yes, I want to…for all eternity… forever bound in marriage. That could never happen. I love his eyes…oh is ears oh so much…... Im losing myself again.

I am home. I run to my bedroom, hungry for its warmth and soft cover. What's wrong honey? My mom asks. My mom doesn't know. No one knows. Or should I say _**knew. "**_nothing mom, just coming home for today". "oh alright honey" I am finally in my room. Instead of my bed, I go to my stand. I have made my decision. I can never go back, and I wont. No matter how much it hurts. I take out a piece of paper. And begin to write.

/

I jump in. my thoughts are broken and simple. I only have one goal and one goal one only. To attain, question and confess to Kagome. I am losing it. My thoughts are short and simple. Immediately I smell her. It seems strongest in her room. Oh no…..what if she is hurting herself again? No…. I smell no blood…. I am frantic now. I knock on the window. No one there. Wait…there is a lump under the cover. I open the window. I rip off the cover hoping that she would still love me. No… it's her stupid cat buyo. I see a small manila folder with my name on it. I open it slowly hoping its something that will show me. Something. Something that will help. It is a letter. I sit down on her bed and begin to read.

_**Dear, Inuyasha **_

_**Before I go, I wanted you to know that, im sorry. Sorry for looking like kikyou, sorry for even discovering the well. Sorry for getting in the way, sorry for being weak. I tried to understand, I really did. It was too much. At first I withheld my feelings only out of rejection. Then, as I learned of your past with kikyou, it was no surprise you could never love another. When I was little, I used to dream of a prince. He was to be strong and brave, honorable, handsome, and even more so supposed to love me in return of my love. You are all of these things. Sometimes, as you sat up in the tree thinking, I wondered if I loved you too much. Then, I though, "you can never love someone too much" now I know. You can love them to the point of hurting. I don't want to hurt anymore. That's why im doing this. It's funny huh? A reincarnation falling in love with it's preincarnations love. I will always remember our times together. No, **_

_**don't get me wrong, I've loved our time together, more importantly, I've always loved you. I just couldn't take it anymore. My only way of relieving the pain is gone now. I know a place where I will never hurt again. I know you will never love me. And I will no longer hope you will. I want to die in peace with nothing to burden me to this world. Goodbye Inuyasha I will always love you. **_

No….that cant be it. I reread the whole thing. That was it. I started to cry. For the first time in 169 years I cried. I cried when my mother died. But….I never got to tell kagome. There was something else in the folder. It was a locket. It was silver. I opened It up. It had a picture of kagome one side and both of us together on the other. I knew at that moment, I loved her.

/

I followed her scent to a cliff two miles west from the shrine. I saw her standing, waiting. I hid behind a rock. She checked her watch. "11:58" she muttered under her breath. I wanted to approach her, but now was not the time. She began to sing. I didn't recognize it but, I soon got the message.

_**Are you, are you, **_

_**Coming to the tree**_

_**Where they strung up a man they say murdered three.**_

She was ready. To die.

_**Strange things did happen here**_

_**No stranger would it be**_

_**If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree.**_

_**Are you, are you**_

_**Coming to the tree**_

_**Where the dead man called out for his love to flee.**_

I stood there in awe.

_**Strange things did happen here**_

_**No stranger would it be**_

_**If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree.**_

_**Are you, are you **_

_**coming to the tree**_

_**Where I told you to run, so we'd both be free.**_

_**Strange things did happen here**_

_**No stranger would it be**_

_**If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree.**_

I was walking toward her now.

_**Are you, are you **_

_**coming to the tree **_

_**Wear a necklace of rope, side by side with me.**_

_**Strange things did happen here**_

_**No stranger would it be**_

_**If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree.**_

I touched her shoulder. She whipped around, not the least bit surprised. She looked at me with somber eyes. "Kagome I need to tell yo- I was cut off. She did something I didn't expect. She cupped my face and kissed me. Not only for seven seconds exactly. "I needed to do that., at least once." I stood there. Again. I looked at her with pleading eyes. All I saw was sadness and pain.

With that, she turned and jumped.


	4. seven seconds

As most people say, when they have near -death experiences, they say their lives flash before their eyes. For me, all I saw were those eyes. _**His**_ eyes. I was not afraid. It was slow. The falling, I mean. I felt like I was flying. Maybe this was all I was looking for. _**Peace**_. It was like I had as much time in the world. I don't even think I felt the pain. All I remember is his beautiful face and my Last moment. When I kissed him. I don't know what came over me. Maybe it was the adrenaline. I just knew I had to do it. I _**needed **_to do it. Then I remember blacking out. I didn't think what would happen next. But when I saw my father's face, I knew I was beyond everything I had ever hoped and dreamt for. I was home.

/

KAGOME! I heard a bloodcurdling scream. Was that me? I cant believe it…

She jumped. I would do something this time. My body would not listen. _**Move! Go get her! You love her!**_ my demon was about to burst. Seven seconds. That's how long I stood there. I was eight seconds too late. I saw her face as she jumped. She was…. Peaceful? How could she be? My demon roared inside me and tore my human heart to shreds cursing at how dense I was to not see her emotions and her pain. I heard a sigh. She was still alive! My body finally moved. I jumped down the cliff with all my strength turning full demon in the process because of my will for her to live. I found her. She was breathing slow, short breaths and blood was everywhere. It was clear she was dying.I knew that only one person could help me. Sesshomaru. As much as it pained him he had to. Plus the fact that he could never truly repay him, Inuyasha had to push his pride down and run.

/

"Rin keep up" Sesshomaru told her as she loved to dance among the flowers and get lost. "Ah-uh come play with me!" "Oh yes lord Sesshomaru!" petty human girl… why if I was lord Sesshomaru I would've killed her in an instant!" Jaken ranted. Sesshomaru stopped suddenly . "O lord Sesshomaru why did we stop?" I smell my hanyou half-brother Inuyasha." Then, Inuyasha came out of the trees with kagome in his arms and landed at Sesshomaru's feet. Well, well, well whatever do we have here? Sesshomaru .. Inuyasha whimpered. "I need your help " what? I didn't hear you." Inuyasha, knowing full well he heard his strangled whisper he once again pushed down his pride and looked fully into Sesshomaru's eyes and said once more, louder, "Sesshomaru! I NEED YOUR HELP!" oh and why little brother will this Sesshomaru help you? " "Because, just because. Even though we may hate each other, we are still brothers that care for each other. Also because I love her….and you're the only one that can help…if you don't so much as help me Sesshomaru I will kill you." Sesshomaru took that as an empty threat but at that precise moment, Rin decided to show up from picking flowers. O hi Inuyasha, how is…what happened to kagome? O lord Sesshomaru you have to help her! Will she die? Oh please lord Sesshomaru!" if it wasn't for rin's pestering he surely have said no and killed Inuyasha right there and then. "Rin…if I do this will you be quiet?" "O yes lord Sesshomaru!" fine. 'Inuyasha… lay her down.' As Sesshomaru unsheathed Tenseiga, Inuyasha did as he was told and prayed a silent prayer that it would work.

/

Dad? Is that you? I was in a white meadow, full of lilies and blue butterflies. It was so calm here. So reassuring and safe. I knew I could stay here forever. "Yes honey, and my, have you grown!" "Ha-ha dad." I got up and hugged him. He smelled of cinnamon and earth. Finally he broke the hug. "Awww sweetie I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you". "You're here now aren't you?" "Yes, honey but there something I must explain." His face change to a saddened expression. Honey I know it hurts but, sometimes pain is the first step in happiness. I know your reasons for doing those "acts of self-harm" and that suicide was only out of _**too **_much love, But your not ready yet. Not ready for what dad? I ask suspiciously. "_**To die." **_you have too much too live for. And more so that Inuyasha loves you. No….dad I'm.. _**I was **_just a jewel shard collector. He loves Kikyou. The sentence tasted bitter in my mouth. HE LOVES KIKYOU! I screamed aloud. "No. he loves you." My dad said. "Look." then a large wispy cloud came to a halt in front of me and there was a small screen with the word Higurashi on it. It turned on and I saw Inuyasha. He was holding my body. I couldn't believe it. Then he was with Sesshomaru. At first I couldn't understand them, but then I heard Inuyasha say " because I love her". he loved me? Really? But of course I would have to be dead for him to admit it, but maybe I never gave him the chance…. "Kagome… kagome?" I was in a daze. "This isn't real, I had died, I am dead!" Kagome! My dad shook me. "You have to go now, but remember I love you no matter what. He gave me a kiss on the forehead and I plummeted into darkness. "Tell your mother I said hi!" was the last thing I heard.


	5. Shockwave

Her eyes fluttered open, awakened from the blissful dream of her father. Oh how she missed him. She wanted to go back, to tell him she didn't want to hurt anymore. She awakened surprised to find herself in Inuyasha's arms. She looked at him, and saw so much pain and love and sorrow, she just couldn't take it. She cried silent tears and he took no time in telling her.

/

"Kagome? Ka…gome?" Her eyes opened but she was still away. Her glazed eyes stared upward into nothingness. She sighed and then a blue light surrounded her and then ….. She looked up at me. I looked at her with so much love and thankfulness, she started to cry. " I love you." I said it with all the truth and love in my heart. She shook her head, still with even more tears coming to those words. " no…..no….NO you don't! My heart dropped. "Kagome.." I tried to hug her but she pulled away, she was up now and backing away from me. Sesshomaru had been long gone away after he swung his sword. My heart was breaking at how much I broke her. Kikyou is who you love! I -I am a jewel collector- I am a replaceme- Suddenly she was shaking, and in second she was on the ground unconscious .

/

He told me he loved me. I knew it wasn't a lie. Deep down in my heart. But I still couldn't get passed the doubt, or the shock or even the reality of what it meant. Something came over me, my heart felt heavy and I couldn't breathe. My eyesight was blurring and I couldn't see Inuyasha anymore. I couldn't to yell aimlessly in any direction. ."Kikyou is who you love! I-I" my breathing failed but I continued, I am just a jewel collector- I am just a replaceme- my heart burned and my head screamed in agitation. I saw him rushing toward me and I remember the black spiral of earth's ending. /

I was frantic. "I am not going to lose you again! Kagome wake up!" I lifted her up on my back and I ran , almost flew to Edo, keade's village. "Keade!" I screamed. Oh child what is the matter? Oi is that Kagome -sama? " Help her! Help her! Please! "Inuyasha what happened to her?" Keade please! she, started trembling and then fell unconscious! I was too scared to say anything else. After that Keade took her into the hut and looked at her. I waited. I waited for six hours. Forever to me. I needed her. Inuyasha! Someone called. I listened ,but it was only keade. "Inuyasha she has no wounds or scratches but I do believe is as a form of sickness." well!? I screamed, restless over the situation. "It is a sickness of the heart, more so the soul. I believe it is a broken heart, and I do not know how she will fare over your protection and earnest feelings."

I got the message. She was sick. Because of me. I had to do something. I didn't think of how she would feel with me now. I still couldn't get over what she said, that I loved kikyou and that she was just a jewel shard collector. She was so much more, I couldn't know where to start. "Okay" I quietly answered Keade. 'Inuyasha you may go in but I advise you to be quiet. She is still unconscious . I walked in the hut, and was saddened at what I saw. She was on a futon, with her arms to her side. She looked distressed and in pain. I decided I would never leave her again. If koga came I would defend her. If Hojo came I would kill him. If kikyou came…. I would give her up. I vowed to be there forever and always. I would help her understand that I loved her. I would be there when she awoke and I would be there when she went back to sleep. "I'm sorry kagome." I said aloud, knowing if she could hear me, she would take me in her arms.


	6. Astro projection angst

I spent weeks watching him, grieving over my body. No, I was not dead. I was in a coma. A deep, livid coma. For two days after I fell into a coma, it was darkness . No anything. On the third day, I was out of my body. Watching Him. He stayed with me, my body, my soul was out crying , yelling his name behind him, in front of him. Still he did not budge. He brought me flowers like I was dead. I did not want to wait enough that he started to believe it.

I wanted to be with him so bad, I couldn't bear it. I pace now around my body, him against the wall now. Staring. His eyes had gotten dark circles around them, his robe didn't quite fit now. I sat down and try to comfort him with my ghostly arms around his neck in a obscure hug. I don't know if he could feel me or not, but he tensed. He wrapped his arms around my waist would've been, and whispered something I hold dear to my heart.

" I love you kagome and don't you ever forget it."

/

And then Kikyou came.

/

Two days from now would be his human night. I had a feeling something big was going to happen when I saw the glowing unearthly light of Kikyou's soul collectors. I wondered now, what would be his choice. This is what I've been waiting for, what we've all been waiting for.

Would he be shunned from his lies if he went? Would I ever wake if he did? And for the first time, since my coma, I didn't cry.

/

It's been a month. A month without her bright smile, A month without her hand in mine. I'm missing those sits too….

I swear one day I could feel her. She was hugging me. My eyes were on her body, but my soul felt her. It felt the urge to speak, to let her know that I loved her.

"I love you kagome and don't you ever forget it."

I meant it, with all my being. She didn't say a word, but I wrapped my arms around her and leaned over. To any one coming in, I would look like I was hugging air. But, no, I knew better, I wasn't air, my soul said it was something solid, real. I felt my arms wrap around someone that I wanted to be with everyday of my life.

The next day, kikyou came. I wondered if I should go to her now, to explain that we're done. I promised kagome that I wouldn't leave her. Sure to get food, flowers, and check with other villages to see what Naraku was up too, but this was…. Kikyou. I decided I better have this all finished by the time kagome woke up. I knew she would, she had to,

So, I went.


	7. Vague

I lay down in my body and concentrate. For the first time since this otherworldly punishment think of all the times we, Inuyasha and I, shared something. Something beautiful, something that's true love.

I concentrated on the memories of flying through the sky, of defeating demons, of eating together and even when I made the promise of staying by his side. I can feel my soul being anchored again. As much as people say they want to be free, I at this moment, want to be rooted, stopped in this time with him.

Even if, at this moment he is with kikyou, and I alone in this hut, I am struggling to hold on to my soul and my sanity. I can feel a darkness reminding me off the bad times, when I felt the emptiness of every time he left, leaving me alone, of when that horrid baby looked into my soul, and even as not that it's a bad memory, when he kissed me.

When he kissed me, I just knew this is where I wanted to be, where I belonged. I also knew, it wasn't my choice, to decide, if it was my part to play. There had to be something for me in this world and I was determined to find out. At this realization I could feel myself lower down and settle. I was home.

/

So many thoughts ran through my head about Kagome. _Kagome.._

I ran through the forest, trying to get to kikyou and settle this. I needed to hurry to get back to kagome. I needed to be with her. I couldn't stand it. Not hearing her voice, not holding her , not witnessing her smile everyday. In my ignorance of kikyou, I didn't notice Kikyou's barrier.

/

"Hello Inuyasha… I see you are deep in thought." Her voice had a cruel tint to it, that said _I hate you, you disgust me, die with me. _"Kikyou? Let me in!"

She continued. "I see my reincarnation has captured your heart." She spit out in distain.

He stared at her with sadness and angry boiling in his golden orbs.

"Kikyou, I need you to understand, I can't do this anymore. I don't know if I even ever loved you if our love was betrayed so easily!"

"Oh, I understand", she rolled her eyes, looking at him with a burning hellfire in her own eyes.. "You want me to die again!"

He looked down in shame. He did. Once again those emotions, Grief and Anger battled the guilt of Kikyou's death. Usually when these emotions got hold off him, Kagome would always be there to distract him or comfort him in some way. But she wasn't.

Again he was so lost in thought again that he didn't see another one of Kikyou's arrows whiz by his arm.+

He turned back to face her, this time his eyes glaring accusingly. she smirked.

"Pay attention to me, and me only, or else I might do something else you wouldn't like."

Oh, how he could kill her now and be done with it. But he wanted her to go peacefully, he wanted her to go by her own will this time.

'

"Feh."

She held him close for a moment, and whispered in his ear. 'Tell me you love me Inuyasha, tell me you need me." He grunted. He couldn't do this, it felt so wrong to do this. While kagome, helpless in that hut, he out here with this dirt- incarnation. He looked down at her, this woman, this deteriorating woman disgusted him. "Do it!" His demon side spoke up in his head about what he should do. _**'Kill HER!' **_

"_**I love you kikyou… I need you."**_

"Kiss me Inuyasha…"

She tasted like dirt. Cold dirt. He kept kissing her out of spite, out of longing for the real thing. And before he realized it, before he comprehended it, he knew he needed this.

/

Kagome stood behind the bushes watching. Waiting. Before she left go off her soul again she began to sing, letting go off his image of his lies, of his love. She could freely accept it now, knowing she had the ability to deny it. She was ready.

_I will wander 'til the end of time, __torn away from you._

_I pulled away to face the pain._

I found a way to face the pain. It wasn't the right way, but it helped. I grew from it. This, this, life is materialistic, vague. I learned to accept that I am, always will, forever be kagome. Light and darkness. Good and evil. Sorrow with my fate is intertwined with Inuyasha's. I am reincarnate, and nothing. I am not the carrier of Kikyou's soul, I am the defender.

_Over the fear that I will never findA way to heal my soul._

_H_e heard her melodious voice, and he could not bear the memories, the feelings, the pain. Of what was done. Of what had occurred. Of the outcome. He rose off the ground and lifted his ears to follow this cursed angel, this broken girl.

_And I will wander 'til the end of time_

He would find her. He slowly walked through his forest, listening trying to hold on to something, to her voice, to her love.

_Torn away from heart is broken_

I am of what she could've been, what she will be. I am larger, I am the ultimate form of my own soul. There will be no other.

_Sweet sleep, my dark angel_

Her voice sounded so distant now, so forgone and alone. He ran faster. Faster. Pushing all his strength.

_Deliver us from sorrow's hold(Over my heart)_

_I can't go on living this way_

_But I can't go back the way I came_

Kikyou is the mistake I am, Kagome, is the future, the truth.

_Chained to this fear that I will never find_

He arrived at the sacred tree. He could still hear her voice, but he didn't see or smell her.

_A way to heal my soul_

_And I will wander 'til the end of time_

_Half alive without you_

_My heart is brokenS_

_weet sleep, my dark angel __Deliver us_

_Change - open your eyes to the light_

_I denied it all so long, oh so long_

Where was she! His resolve was beginning to die, and he had an animalistic urge to kill something.

_Say goodbye, goodbye_

_My heart is broken_

_Release me, I can't hold on_

_Deliver us_

So many times, I wanted to break her. And other times I wanted to cry for her. For myself. I felt it when she died, when she stole Inuyasha away from me. From ourselves. One part that cannot be erased, in mistake and in truth, is my, our, love for him. I cannot deny that.

_My heart is broken_

_Sweet sleep,__my dark angel_

_Deliver us_

_My heart is broken_

_Sweet sleep, my dark angel_

He was resting against the base of the tree, still trying to hold on, when he could finally smell her, finally see her. Finally understand.

_Deliver us from sorrow's hold_

And I accept it.


End file.
